Life Transitions in Atlanta, GA
Life transitions range from losing a parent to having a baby; from the biggest celebrations to the hardest losses. This past couple of years, the world went through a huge transition called the pandemic. Most life transitions are chosen but some, like a worldwide pandemic, are simply put in our path to navigate.
Whether positive like marriage or negative like divorce, Remain Connected Counseling would love to support you in this journey. We are looking for stability and peace. Then when we cannot find them, it is wise and brave to seek help. Like the book I (Mayra) read to my two-year-old daughter says, “One of the bravest things you can do is ask for help.” Lizzy the Lioness
Relationships & Life Transitions in Atlanta
Ok, let's talk about going from single to dating. Dating has changed drastically; we have Bumble, Hinge, Tinder, OkCupid, Grinder, etc. Plus all the old websites like eharmony, match.com, etc. We are bombarded with software that will find you the perfect person and then what?
Dating is hard, going from “I have all the time in the world to do what I want,” to “oh yeah, there's another person to include about my social life,” is not easy.
When I (Mayra) started dating my husband, Gavin, I left to go to Europe for a month. From there I traveled to California and then went back to Europe. Finally, after two months we were actually together.
The amount of effort that Gavin and I put into connecting during our dating relationship was enormous. It takes time and effort to date. It takes intentionality that you did not have to have before. The great things about dating like companionship, adventure, and romance are combined with having less time. For things such as connecting with your friends, doing your hobbies as often, and finding time for yourself.
Life may feel like a juggling act that you fail over and over again. You do not have to do this alone, no one should navigate taking on a dating relationship alone. Our Atlanta therapists are here to support you.
Did you know that introverts have a higher likelihood of becoming depressed in their first year of marriage? Even as a depression therapist it happened to me. I was so used to having my space, my quiet nights, and my time away from people to refresh. When I got married, if I wasn’t surrounded by people at work, I was next to my spouse. I absolutely love and like my spouse. However, that did not deflect from being stressed with all the changes that as an introvert were a little bit harder to manage. My first thought was,” Oh my gosh am I not supposed to be married?”
Thankfully my counselor helped me navigate how to express my needs and wants to my husband. Allowing me to feel more balanced and more me. Gavin was still there when I got home but I grew in learning how to take care of myself, As a result, it allowed my marriage to thrive as well.
Other common challenges in this transition are: navigating in-laws, doing social life together and separate, and yes, learning to live with another person who will impact you for the rest of your life.
Everything changes and even when you feel so prepared, nothing can make you 100% prepared for what is about to happen to your marriage. It is bonding and beautiful and frustrating and hard. Your and your spouse's focus is on this tiny human. Additionally, you both have opinions on how things should be done. The very opportunity for partnership turns into a fight about who knows best. New moms feel inadequate and new dads feel ignored or vice versa. Sometimes even both for each.
You have never loved someone so much and you are so scared to screw it up that your spouse becomes the enemy in your conquest for perfection. Let me tell you, there is hope. Life transitions do not have to be this way. You can learn to like your spouse again. Love does not change but liking them again is key to thriving in marriage and learning to work as a team. It takes time and guidance that our Atlanta therapists would love to give you.
Single to Married Life Transitions
Life Transitions & Becoming a New Parent in Atlanta
Wow. Enter all the topics from above plus input all the other changes becoming a new parent brings. First, let's talk about the relationship and time. The time when I would come home on a Friday evening and have time with my spouse before we decided on a restaurant or even to go out spontaneously is far gone. I just remember the first time I said, “oh let's go to dinner!” and my husband replied, “Ok, who will watch Leona while she sleeps.” Can you bring your child to dinner? Absolutely. Is it the same as just the two of you, of course not.
Becoming a New Mom
I did not want to have children until my niece was born in 2015 and the childbirth experience left me speechless. From pure awe of God’s miracle of life. God changed my heart but that did not fail to have its challenges. From breastfeeding challenges to fears of feelings out of control (which I used to feel constantly) to experiencing resentment towards my spouse because his body, schedule, and life did not change (at least that’s what the enemy will tell you), to [insert your own struggle}. I probably went through it and still experience it from time to time.
Everything changes and even when you feel so prepared, nothing can make you 100% prepared for what is about to happen to your Christian marriage. It is bonding and beautiful and frustrating and hard. Your and your spouse's focus is on this tiny human and you both have opinions on how things should be done. The very opportunity for team-ship turns into a fight about who knows best. Moms feel inadequate and dads feel ignored or vice versa or both for each.
Becoming a Dad
My husband will write about this. I want to start by saying that his dream in life was to be a dad. Let me tell you when we had Leona he was and is 1000% a super dad.
As childless adults, all the time we have is basically ours. Outside of work and any other commitments, you choose what you want or want to do and it’s as simple as that. We’ll call that free time. This free time diminishes in varying degrees as you date and get married. But it’s still there - your hobbies and interests are still readily accessible. Date nights happen as often as you’d like, and spontaneous get-togethers with friends are fun and easy. Once this life transition happens and that beautiful baby comes along, all this free time becomes increasingly hard to find.
You are now responsible for a tiny life and that takes time. There exists a grieving of sorts in the midst of great joy - time alone with your wife is fleeting and most conversations are about your child. Any time for hobbies is greatly reduced. The bottom line, though, is that being a dad is one of life’s greatest joys and the fact that your priorities have shifted is just part of it. It does take some adjustment, but I have found that all the free time and hobbies I previously enjoyed pale in comparison to the fulfillment and fun that is had when spending time with my daughter. To see the wonder in her eyes as we watch birds fly by or play in the sand is my new favorite hobby, and I’m overjoyed to say that this hobby will last a lifetime.
Transitioning to Remote Work in Atlanta
The pandemic brought unique life transitions to our work lives. With offices largely shutting down and relying on remote and telecommuting work, our day-to-day looks very different from pre-pandemic times. In-person office social interactions that served as a mental break or built friendships became nearly non-existent. So many came to realize how vital human interaction is to our wellbeing.
Since physically commuting came to a halt, leaving the house became a more intentional act. This helped to create a tricky balance between work and personal time at home. Without clear and observed boundaries, the workday could easily extend into the evening and infringe on family or self-care time.
When transitioning to remote work this boundary is so important for our minds to relax and release stress from the day. Some of this stress may have been caused by the lack of visibility to coworkers - especially a manager or boss. Unless you remain in constant communication with your work team, there is no telling how your boss perceives your productivity. This can be a point of stress to prove your value and worth to the team.
At Remain Connected Counseling in Smyrna, GA we know video conferencing is a good way to help show your face when being in person is not an option. Regular check-ins or calls are helpful to show earnest intent and add a more personal touch than email.
Life Transitions have positive and negative stress to them.
Everyone deals with life transitions differently and we can all use some help for them.
We use therapeutic theories like CBT to help you identify the core beliefs you have about change. Thus helping you choose a different theory to process and express the emotions and feelings it brings. I prefer using psychodynamic theories to identify what childhood experiences have helped you through transition stress and find solutions on how to find better coping mechanisms. Our Atlanta therapists are ready to guide you through your life transitions no matter what they are.
Start Therapy for Life Transitions in Atlanta, GA
Are you going through life transitions right now? Remain Connected Counseling in Georgia can help whether it is one of the life transitions mentioned above or something else entirely. Our Atlanta therapists can help by giving you support and guidance through these changes. In order to get started follow these steps:
Other Services Offered At Remain Connected Counselings in Smyrna, GA
We provide lots of different types of mental health services so you can start getting the support that you need. At our Smyrna, GA therapy practice, we offer services such as teen counseling, trauma therapy, PTSD counseling, anxiety treatment, and EMDR. As well as Pastoral counseling, therapy for stress and burnout, and depression counseling. and more all under a Christian counseling lens. We also offer these services to anyone in the state of Georgia through online therapy. Learn more about our team of dedicated Atlanta therapists, check out our blog, or contact us to get started.